Apology checker

It says what you did, in plain words. It owns it, without a “but.” And when it fits, it offers to make it right, or says what you’ll do differently. An explanation can come too, as long as it doesn’t take the apology back.

• “Sorry if you felt…” or “sorry you feel…”, which apologize for their feeling, not for something you did.
• A “but” after sorry, which can turn the apology into a defense.
• “As you know” or “you know how” before a reason, which says they should have made allowances.
• Making it small: “just,” “a little,” “a bit.”
• Asking them to move on: “can we just forget it?”

A few apologies that take some of it back, and the same apology after the check: their own words, with only what takes it back taken out, and what they added in their own words.

It shows what’s already working and what might take it back, and gives you back your apology in your own words, with only those taken out. If you didn’t say what you’re sorry for, it asks (“I’m sorry I…”). You can add how it affected them, a way to make it right, or what you’ll do next time, in your words. It never writes the apology for you, and it won’t push you to take blame that isn’t yours. A passing sorry, like “sorry, can’t make it tonight,” gets the usual Quills Check instead.

The guide walks through the whole apology: naming what you did, hearing how it landed, and what to do if they need time.